Editor's note: This story was ready to publish when the pandemic changed the world and life as we knew it. Courts, schools, businesses — all must adapt, decide, connect — and keep going though essential protocols for services are disrupted. A recent series of visits to a veterinary practice, once in an emergency, then for followup and another for a new set of issues revealed how important it is to help each other. To ease suffering with dedication and compassion, skill and medicine or law — never taken for granted. To support wellbeing in mind, body, soul takes experience and listening, art, integrity and science plus knowledge. Stress manifests in many ways for humans and companions animals, livestock. With lockdowns and the shoals of life, professionals help people who are sometimes silently suffering and seek solutions. Here then is a journey of one man who become an attorney and founded a law firm. Finding a way to help people and families with focus, asking questions to clarify direction and make vital decisions seems particularly apt in this era of adaptations.

The original edition began with these words, framed and seen during on a photo session for this story: “One smile can start a friendship. One word can end a fight. One look can save a relationship. One person can change your life.”

Attorney Jeremiah N. Ollennu will tell you that change is hard, but it is best to face things and take control, because getting through tough times means facing difficulties not avoiding them. Once addressed, new growth is then possible. “All human activities are relational. So many of the disputes we have start from relationships.”

Ollennu, originally from Ghana (West Africa), came to the U.S. when he was 19, in 1994. He and his family now reside in Connecticut, where the law firm he founded has three locations.

“My objective originally was to go to medical school, to become a doctor. It's what my mother wanted and all my life I was serious with science. So at first I was pursuing a degree in chemical engineering in New Jersey, and thinking maybe someday transition to become a neurologist.

But life happened.

“It was quite interesting as a immigrant working two jobs to put myself through school,” he recalled.

It was exhausting and unrewarding. How to resolve this impasse? Make another decision. He chose the U.S. Navy because to work and serve his country plus continue his education meant becoming a hospital corpsman, 8404 training, training with the U.S. Marines.

Travels included Camp Pendleton in California, then Okinawa, and Groton, Connecticut, which became his last duty station. The reality of medical work by real-life experience helped clarify his path.

“Through that process, working in hospitals and alongside doctors, somewhere alone the line my goals became clearer. I thought perhaps I could be of greater service if I followed a passion that had been in my mind but I have not given enough energy.”

The journey became even clearer during his exit interview, when the commanding officer of the hospital asked, “Why not stay in the military? You'd advance in the ranks and continue to do well?”

“I said I have a goal, I want to be a lawyer. He replied, ‘do you know what it takes to be a lawyer?' And I said not yet, but I'm going to do it.”

Ollennu then set out to talk to as many attorneys as possible, an unconventional but determined approach of dedicated research for his life trajectory. This method of learning proved to be a common thread throughout his life. Talking and then listening to people to help clarify goals.

“I talked to every lawyer I could find — in any kind of practice and found that most of them were not very happy, there was no true philosophy of service. But one man I spoke with loved being a lawyer, he basically said: don’t listen to anyone, chase this dream, do it. ”

That advice proved to be a turning point and he decided to go to law school with the goal was to help clients and to help families.

He served as a family law clerk for the Superior Court of Middlesex where he gained valuable court room experience in family law, then chose Vermont Law School and graduated in 2006. Chose Connecticut rather than return to New Jersey. Worked in the financial industry Citigroup's Smith Barney, as a financial advisor in the West Hartford office. “Wonderful people to work with.” He completed a Master of Laws (LLM) studies in International Economic Law at the University of Kent, Canterbury, U.K.

“There is no substitute, no greater reward to serve your your community and learn at the same time. My wife had a different philosophy, and that was work to sustain our family. So after learning everything I could, I decided to start my own practice.”

Ollennu and Associates LLC, a family law practice firm, now has three locations in Connecticut. Portland. Hartford. New London.

“Our firm's vision: Help people through changes in their life so they can grow. Empower people to see very clearly what they already have and reflect on their goals,” he said.

Ollennu is licensed to practice law both in the U.S. and in Ghana. Admitted to the Connecticut Bar in 2006, he is a member of the Middlesex County Bar Association, Connecticut Bar Association, and American Bar Association as well as a practicing attorney to all Judicial Districts in the State of Connecticut and U.S. District Courts.

So. What are the values you live by?

“In most instances when in our practice we see people get very emotional about money, that is because they’re values are threatened. So the money seems to be a very important part of it, but the moment we stop fighting about money you realize that money becomes the end, it’s no longer about what values my family has, what relationships I have with my spouse or my ex-spouse, what kind of business venture I'm doing. Money helps us to to run a business, pay our bills, take care of our family. Money has no value until we as people put a value on it. When we go to court, I see the conflict all the time.

“What I do for my clients as an attorney and as a law firm and is about life and the practice of law. Helping people is a service that I can provide and as our firm is growing. To listen to people and help them clearly see what they already have and how to take their values and exercise those values.”

Three questions

Three points to ask yourself before visiting an attorney. (Also good advice for life goals.)

“I always ask my clients three questions,” he said. “First, is what do I want? Addressing the client, I mean.

“The second question is why do I deserve to get what I want?. Because when you plead in court or file motions, the body of the motion or the pleading is first you say here's what I want and the pleading is why I deserve what I want.

“There at the end is the wherefore clause, and that is the basis of the third question. So, I told you what I want. I've told you why I deserve it. Now I'm telling you what I want to get, to the judge. This is why. People can spend thousands of dollars, but achieve nothing if they don't know what they want.

So the third question is: how do I help you?

“A lawyer should be tell you that by the facts of your case and by the law that applies, you either deserve it or you do not. If the lawyer gets overly creative, the lawyer can get creative with facts, but the law is the law. So he can't really dance with it.

“What we do is tell you based on what a client explains; what you want and why you think you deserve it. So the response is here’s how we’re going to do it, the means. Based on the law, procedural law. The benefit our firm provides is to bring the goals down to just the basics, clarify all to take the process out of the realm of mystery.

“Lawyers are not very mysterious people, they are ordinary people. But many lawyers lose their way quickly because the problems can get very heavy, quickly.

Change is life. A simple word — help — is one of the most difficult for many people to say. But that decision can be a key that turns a rough road into one that can be navigated.

“Practicing family law for more a decade is experience which allows us to help clients navigate this difficult aspect of life.”

Since 2008, he provides reconciliation counseling, assists couples in collaborative divorce, divorce mediation and rigorously represents clients in family, custody and dissolution of marriage disputes. His experience and focus includes child custody disputes including litigation and resolution, child support enforcement matters, alimony modification, grandparents’ rights, juvenile and child protection matters as well as property division including real-estate and retirement assets.

​Ollennu believes that the best way to resolve family disputes is through the process of divorce mediation.

He has successfully mediated numerous cases and remains open to alternative dispute resolution means whenever possible; he is a zealous advocate for his traditional divorce clients.

Divorce invokes change and while change can be painful, it can also be an avenue for growth.

“We ask that our clients consider what they would like their life to look like after divorce and we work on how to get them there. There is a wide range of divorce temperature, from cool and amicable, to hot and contested. Our firm has handled the whole range and we can step in wherever your divorce happens to be. In any case, our goal is the outcome. Our desire is for each and every one of our clients to feel safe, understood and supported.”

“To recognize the solution to conflict starts with me — the client — because inside each problem is a solution. The problem points to a conflict in thinking and choices. To see that the relationship between the solution and the problem begins a process but that requires the client to identify the problem and own it. Like digging a hole and digging it wider, you will be out of the hole; but continuing the same activities had to stop.”

Mediation is a method couples can use to get divorced in a low-conflict environment. This allows them to work with a neutral third party and divorce on their terms, prior to appearing in court.

Also available is coaching for individuals and couples to strengthen their relationship.
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The firm handles primarily family law matters, family law litigation, family mediation and family disputes. Also divorce mediations, custody mediations, and custody litigation. Personal injury.

“We deal with serious injury but we deal with people who deserve to get personal attention so they can navigate themselves and get themselves back from serious injury. To help the client and find a solution to the problem created. Problems happen if we do not take ownership of the situation and we instead delegate it to someone else. For a solution, the problem is mine. Anger is not productive and does not help.

​Estate planning is an important part of life that people should carefully think through. The firm can help create documents from wills, living wills, health care representatives, power of attorney and conservatorships.

For family law, as a well-respected member of the family bar and is appointed as attorney for minor children (AMC) by the Superior Court Judges to represent children’s interest in Family Courts, Juvenile Courts and in various child protection cases. He also serves as guardian ad litem (GAL) to represent the best interest of children in highly contested family disputes. Also post-judgment modifications.

Note: This story is one in a series about people in business, how each found their passion for what they do and have achieved. Founders must not only focus and deploy abilities, each must juggle all aspects of running a business and/or outsource accounting, legal, insurance, human relations. This is not for everyone, but those who find a way may light the way for others to be inspired and also take that step, which may or may not lead to success. Don't die wondering.

“Only one thing is ever guaranteed, that is that you will definitely not achieve the goal if you don’t take the shot.” Wayne Gretzky

Disclosure: Mr. Ollennu is an advertiser; listening to his story about finding a way to change course and reach his own fulfilling professional career, and found a law firm and choose Connecticut as his home and business location was compelling enough that we believe it should be shared for our readers. His plans for writing a book may be disrupted with COVID-19, and all has changed with the court system as well as life. Story will be updated when appropriate.